Disinviting Bar Kamtza

We're now entering the  month of Iyar, which lacks a festival like Nissan and Sivan and is given over to the level of aveilus observed for the deaths of 12,000 pairs of talmidim of R' Akiva.  Why do we still do it? It's a question one of my kids who hates being deprived of music has asked.

 I have new insight into it this year. We haven't learned the lesson we were supposed to from the calamity that befell those who failed to be noheg kavod ze es ze.

Not only do we fail to show basic civility and respect, but we go out of our way to single people out for shame and humiliation. Of course, we claim we have only the best intentions in doing so. But that was Penina's excuse in humiliating Chana, and she was punished extremely severely for that.

What I saw on Twitter today made me instinctively evoke Kamtza and Bar Kamtza. One woman in Israel was complaining that her neighbors declared they would not be vaccinated. She automatically assumed they are selfish and so less human than she is and seemed to seek out validation and a way to put down such people. She got a suggestion to do just that.

One woman responded that she should make a big, noisy party and let the neighbors know that they were not invited because it was just for vaccinated people. 

I guarantee you that the host of the party that led to the destruction of the Temple was thinking along exactly those lines when he wanted Bar Katza thrown out. And this saddens me tremendously because I know that we are killing any chance of seeing it rebuilt while such attitudes remain applauded within our own community 

 Nearly 11 years ago I wrote about the Maharal's take in Netzach Yisrael  on the incident that was the spark for the fire that consumed the Bais Hamikdash: 

The question is why is the account named for Kamtza and Bar Kamtza?  Kamtza is not even present in the story.  He was on the guest list, but did not even show up to the feast because his invitation was delviered to Bar Kamtza by mistake. So why should his name be connected with the event that is pointed to as the cause of the churban?  

The Maharal explains that when sinas chinam dominates, even the love of friendship becomes corrupted as a means to divisiveness and exclusion.     The "love"  that the host of the feast had "for Kamtza was in truth chiluk vepirud umachlokes kemo hasina [division and separation and dissension tantamount to hatred]. It was a means to division -- a group of intimates formed for the sake of excluding others.  The name of Kamtza refers to separation, for its root refers to kemitza [removal] as in "vekamatz misham" (Vayikra 2:2) "That which is separated and removed from everything is call kmitza." Thus the name of Kamtza  signifies that even the relationship of friends was  corrupted into a manifestation of separation rather than of love when sinas chinam dominates. 

So we this today in new factions being created: the ones who believe a mask is the ultimate mark of  caring and those who don't buy into, the ones who want everyone vaccinated stat and those who wish to hold back on something that has been rushed out without the usual length of time typically allowed for testing. No nuance is allowed to be seen, and it's an alien concept to consider that no every single person has the same risk-benefit ratio in mind that you may have. Instead, nearly everyone on one side of the aisle dismisses the other one as foolish, selfish, unscientific, etc. In truth, if you dig through real scientific sources rather than mass media spins, you can find evidence for either side, but we've been influenced by media to think only in simplistic either/or terms and to hate all who disagree with us. 

It's shameful and destructive, and it truly has caused destruction in the past and in the present. 

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