Advice for parents and in-law

from Judith Viorst in Alexander and the Wonderful, Marvelous, Excellent, Terrific Ninety Days. New York: Free Press 2007. p. 54

These are the statements she had to tell herself while her son, daughter-in-law and their 3 children stayed with them for 3 months
"Don't judge, advise, or criticize.
Respect their boundaries and choices.
Accept who they are."

As for the person your child has married,
"when a friend once said to me, 'What am I going to do? I really don't like the woman my son has married,' I a -- a great believer in family intactness -- had only one answer to offer: 'Learn to like her.'"

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